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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29913435">Piss Squad in: Eggleg</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaptainAshFern/pseuds/CaptainAshFern'>CaptainAshFern</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Writer's Block</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Campfire stories, Crack, Crack Relationships, Gen, Minor Original Character(s)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 20:07:56</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,177</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29913435</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaptainAshFern/pseuds/CaptainAshFern</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>posted by ash &lt;3</p><p>campfire style written by juricii, nem, king, jimmy and myself</p><p>the last three sentences were jimmy's contribution lol</p><p> </p><p>juricii as juricii<br/>CaptainAshFern as ash<br/>Kingly_Monarch as king<br/>LesEnfantsPleurent as nemo<br/>SubmergedJuice as jimmy</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Ash &amp; King | Bia &amp; Nemo &amp; Jimmy &amp; Juricii, Ash (The Writer's Block) &amp; Jimmy (The Writer's Block), Ash (The Writer's Block) &amp; Juricii (The Writer's Block), Ash (The Writer's Block) &amp; King | Bia (The Writer's Block), Juricii (The Writer's Block) &amp; Jimmy (The Writer's Block), Juricii (The Writer's Block) &amp; King | Bia (The Writer's Block), Juricii (The Writer's Block) &amp; Nemo (The Writer's Block), King | Bia (The Writer's Block) &amp; Jimmy (The Writer's Block), Nemo (The Writer's Block) &amp; Jimmy (The Writer's Block)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>The Writer's Block</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Piss Squad in: Eggleg</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/juricii/gifts">juricii</a>, <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/Melodious_Cacophony/gifts">Melodious_Cacophony</a>, <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/SubmergedJuice/gifts">SubmergedJuice</a>, <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/LesEnfantsPleurent/gifts">LesEnfantsPleurent</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>pee</p><p>this isn't edited</p><p>who wrote what?? we will never know</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>A person was walking down the road when they saw this weird creature… </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Intrigued, they stopped short on their path, squinting at the horizon to make sure they weren’t hallucinating.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Getting closer they noticed it wasn't just a normal creature, but the legendary eggleg.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What is this?” They asked, walking closer to poke at it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The creature made an indecipherable noise as the person got closer to it. It’s feet slammed on the ground.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The soft sound of footsteps could have easily been lost in the open fields surrounding them, but this person was very involved in the process, making sure to carefully track the creature's movements.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Following the creature to an abandoned cemetery, the person jumped the fence and walked through the graves carefully, as to not disturb anyone.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They came across a group of people, five to be exact, surrounding a small shrine-like thing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Those five people were casually screaming at each other, although the smiles on their faces indicated it wasn’t all that serious.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Now, this person might follow strange eggleg creatures into cemeteries, but they aren’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>that </span>
  </em>
  <span>dumb.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Now, as a certified not-a-dumbass they turned on their heels and speed walked away, until all sound stopped behind them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Suddenly, a child, presumably the youngest of the group, grabbed their arm and dragged them into a circle, and stared into their eyes, unblinking.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>As this was going on, one of the other members summoned a cup of tea from nowhere and awkwardly started drinking it as the others did what they did... </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Now,” the smallest smile was on the edge of predatory, and fear ran down the stranger’s spine,”Where do </span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span> think you’re going?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The tallest of the group sighed loudly as if expecting this to happen and plopped themselves on the floor “Thay, really?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The one staring quickly snapped out of their stare, jolting out of their state with a “Sorry, I got distracted- Oh yeah.” They pulled out an axe from absolutely nowhere.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The one drinking the tea shook their head in exasperation, and pinched their nose bridge. “I’m sorry… But where the </span>
  <em>
    <span>frick </span>
  </em>
  <span>did you get that Axe from, and </span>
  <em>
    <span>why </span>
  </em>
  <span>are you even equipping it?” Her eyes went into slits.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Shush starlight,” The pink themed one sat down next to the tallest,”I did </span>
  <em>
    <span>nothing wrong here.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“I saw you taking my pink skirt” the other shrugged, seemingly calm, but clearly slightly pissed off</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We don’t ask questions, Juri. Also, It’s for murder, obviously. I have myself a worthy sacrifice for once, don’t take this from me.” The blonde, holding an axe and also wearing glasses, said, with a tinge of insanity trailing the words.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Juricii suddenly felt the need to bonk their head on a non-existent table, so that’s exactly what they did. They looked at the eggleg and their thoughts went back to what they, the Piss Squad/Piss Gang should do with it…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nemo gazed at the stranger, panic still clear in their eyes, and blinked once. Than twice. A large smile bloomed on her face, and not the nice kind.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>On the floor they sighed, tired “It’s three am and here we go again” they got a pan from absolutely nowhere and threw it at Juri, ‘’Do it already”.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The blonde with an axe stared at the stranger, before pulling out a stove, and opening the oven panel, before shoving the egg and stranger in it, saying that “I am Ash and you are going to become an omelette.” They smiled, sharp and one parallel to a madman.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Juricii shook her head, accepting the fact that her followers and fellow members of the Piss Squad were simply built different. She sighed as the others prepared to decimate the eggleg and stranger, and watched in silence.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wait, are we </span>
  <em>
    <span>actually</span>
  </em>
  <span> cooking someone? Since when do we condone cannibalism? Also, ash, dearest, why are you making an omelette </span>
  <em>
    <span>in the oven</span>
  </em>
  <span> instead of the cooking top?” Nemo sounded more amused than bothered, but there was an edge of worry lacing her words.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘’We eating the person as well? Pooog’’ King sounded excited, dragging Nemo to the floor with them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ash grinned evilly. “I always make omelettes in the oven, you expired blanket tube.” She turned on the oven to 420 fahrenheit, and walked backwards. “Yes we are cooking someone. In a cemetery. More ghosts, pog.” Ash danced a little gremlin dance, their glasses almost falling off of their face in the process.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Juricii coughed. “I’m sorry but </span>
  <em>
    <span>what the fuck did I just hear? </span>
  </em>
  <span>Shit was not cash money, that’s for sure. When the Piss Squad was established and ya’ll became members, I did not sign up for </span>
  <em>
    <span>this </span>
  </em>
  <span>shit. B R U H. PAIN IS ALL I KNOW, HUH. But you know… </span>
  <em>
    <span>you do you.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Juricii made the peace sign and slowly vanished like she was just Thanos snapped… Like, that one meme… You know the one, right…? Yeah </span>
  <em>
    <span>like that.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>The remaining few simply nod at each other.”Why she’s pissmod, of course.” A small smile blooms on all their faces. “Piss mod’s just the best.” Hums of approval filled the air.</span>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span>“PREACH you so right thay” they nodded, laying on the other and immediately falling asleep, surprisingly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ash stood stock still, before smiling, slightly warmly, and picking up the oven and disposing of it in a nearby oven. “Check this.” They pulled out </span>
  <em>
    <span>another</span>
  </em>
  <span> eggleg, but this one was squatting. They placed near Nemo and King before calling out to Juricii. “Juri, my beloved, please come back, I have the thing. Y’know, the thing.” They held out a fancy rock to the wind. Wind? Where did that come from? We will never know.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Suddenly, Juricii came back looking more tired than before. “Ay, yuh, what’d y’all frickin call me for. I am </span>
  <em>
    <span>tired™ BLS</span>
  </em>
  <span> just let me live…” She groaned. Nonetheless, since she still liked the people from her group, she just decided to go along with their shenanigans, because they were her pog homies. And honestly, she </span>
  <em>
    <span>was </span>
  </em>
  <span>a bit bored… Maybe being a bit chaotic wouldn’t harm anyone… “Ok, uh, anyways… I guess I’ll do something for you. Just give me something to do, I guess…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The tall family-like duo were still cuddling on one side,King drooling in Nemo’s shirt. The Pinkette just sighed slightly, running her fingers through the other’s locks. “You’re lucky you’re pretty,” she grumbled, rolling her eyes and turning her gaze onto the other two.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>King woke up suddenly and brushed it off ‘’What y’all doing over there?’’ they looked over at Juri and Ash, while snuggling closer to Nemo.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Crimes. Also, offering a rock to Juri.” Ash suddenly stared directly at You, the person reading this. “Did you know that you aren’t going to know what happens next? Suffer, reader.” Ash grabbed the site page you were reading this on, and abruptly closed this fanfiction on Archive Of Our Own.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Blinking, Jimmy looked down at their laptop. What the fuck did they just read. Why weren’t they invited to the cuddle party. They closed their lapto</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>notes from below the story w/o images</p><p> </p><p>okay time to post<br/>ME AND THAY CUDDLING SOBS<br/>im plannin gon posting all of this dw<br/>I kind of just want to pop out of nowhere in the story do it do it doitdoitdoitdoitdoitdoitdoitdoitnemo idk where join now!! AFter ash is forn<br/>THE FOURTH WALL :(<br/>NOOOO<br/>OH FUCK<br/>YOU BETTER POST EVERYTHING<br/>EVEN US BEING CRACKHEADS IN HERE, THIS MESSAGES<br/>one more cycle and then ill post this say your best words my beloved piss members</p><p>HALF OF MY SENTENCE IS GONE<br/>Lmao rip<br/>LET’S COOK IT<br/>LOL BET<br/>DO IT<br/>&gt;:D<br/>MIGHT I SUGGEST A SLIGHT SWITCH.<br/>INSTEAD OF ONE LINE EACH, ONE IDEA EACH. THAT WAY WE CAN ACTUALLY WRITE SOMETHING SOMEWHAT COHERENT}<br/>COHERENT? NAH FUCK THAT SHIT<br/>CHAOS MY BELOVED<br/>teehee<br/>.ok :)juri i love you most ;) oop ty</p><p>THis is a mess<br/>Lol<br/>good.<br/>Top 10 anime disasters: number 1: this story lmao<br/>Number 2: taking my skirts b i t c h<br/>EXCUSE YOU, I’M YOUR COOL MOTHERLY SISTER, OFC I TAKE YOUR SKIRTS, IT”S PART OF THE CONTRACT<br/>NO????<br/>write or i will use my gremlin powers<br/>Do it</p></blockquote></div></div>
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